Lilith is the part of us that refuses to submit, that would rather be exiled than deal with oppression. Naturally, Lilith's territory shows us where our unexpressed anger resides. It's where the wildness inherent in our human animalness still exists regardless how it's been nine-to-fived out of us. I share about Lilith now because the faces of all my clients, especially my cisgendered women and trans clients, literally light up when I mention her name. We recognize ourselves in the dark goddesses, the alienated and marginalized, feared and too often despised. Looking at Lilith helps us to bring the unconscious acting out when gaslighted into doubting our own inner knowing into conscious strategies to counter and transform this madness. I'm an advocate for inviting Lilith back to the garden, breaking taboos and making the magic of the untamed parts of us celebrated expressions of our inner wildernesses. In that spirit and the spirit of International Women's Day, I'm excited (and so nervous) to break the abortion taboo. It's one thing to advocate for choice and another thing to publicly acknowledge the importance of one's personal choice. When I was just 19, I got pregnant. It was absolutely not time for me to give birth, let alone become a parent. I was lucky to have the explicit support of just about everyone in my life and it was still incredibly hard. The small town I lived in didn't have a doctor who would perform the procedure. I thought of all the women in areas more rural than me and shudder to this day. The price tag was nontrivial for a working student and got cheaper the further I was willing to travel. Even with all the support in the world, it was tough, but I knew from the beginning what was right for me. Yes, it was hard, but I can promise you that it's not as hard as having a 12 year old right now would be. I recalled some deep wisdom knowing that exists in all our bones, helped along in me by growing up with herbal remedies and gardens, that there were certain plants that could be used to induce miscarriage. I did a ton of research, went to the health food store and started dosing at the highest levels I could while still being safe. It worked. Ever since then I've wondered why there isn't more conversation about the kinds of abortions that are less easily regulated into oblivion. With the recent attacks on health care, I wanted to share my story with the hopes that that information is never driven away again and like Lilith can start to occupy a more central place in our cultural narrative. It's time for abortion to become a non-issue, a right that simply cannot be taken away. To learn more about Lilith, join me at Lynn Bell's talk on Astrological Lilith at The Center for Sex & Culture on Wednesday, March 20th at 7:30pm. I doubt she'll be discussing herbal abortions, but we can have tea beforehand if you want to hear more.
2 Comments
What does it mean to let go of expectations and allow what is to simply (or complicatedly) be? More importantly, how the hell does one get to that sweet place of acceptance? I have a feeling that this Mercury retrograde will bring those questions to the fore of our psyches. All there is to do is feel your way through it. It won't hurt to back up your computer, but in ocean of feeling Pisces, Mercury's retrograde will be more about how we feel when we are running late, not meeting that deadline, encountering that technical difficulty. I caught myself being really mean to myself for not leaving the house soon enough to make it to my drawing class on time. I was frantic until I remembered that in terms of the vastness of all that is was or will be, being on time to a class doesn't actually matter. I was able to shift my perspective enough, only after feeling really bad, just breathed thru it, talked myself down and relaxed. I got to class and we were attending an art opening so no one even noticed my tardiness. The process of letting the feeling come and then go made me better ready to do my creative work. Not so coincidentally, the class was focused on perspective. It's amazing how much can shift when you shift yours. I found myself letting go perfection and going with good enough. I hope to bring that insight into the next few weeks which will surely be filled with a bounty of imperfection and even more good enough if I can just open my eyes to it. I was struck after such a potent, simple lesson, to encounter this brilliant endeavor to use art as ritual. In the heroic effort to let go of disappointment and transform it into contentment, artist Jodi Sharp, takes the words (mercury) exchanged in one of those challenging relationships and literally tries them on. She then wears them into the bathtub (a Pisces place to be sure) and lets the story that I suspect has been so draining, drain away. It creates a beautiful mess as any relationship that lasts long enough will. Do you want to focus on the beauty or the mess? When words get jumbled and misconstrued, when feelings get hurt, when our hearts race around all that we don't have any control over, it's time to look at the sky, seek the vastness and breathe yourself back into the moment. As Jodi's blog name suggests, it's all in process. Be gentle and kind to yourself thru the process. I recommend checking out Jodi's full process and description here too. Pisces loves art, music, poetry, any kind of creativity that gets you in the zone, transcendant and in the present. Mercury the messenger loves doing that which helps you communicate ideas and experiences. Perhaps reading her eloquent words will inspire your very own artful medicine spell for this precious moment. I'm pleased to join the bandwagon of creative cultural workers who are lauding 2013 as the Year of the Witch. Tomorrow marks the beginning of the lunar new year with the dark new moon in Aquarius. I can't imagine a better way to celebrate that eccentric, world shifting sign that by acknowledging the deeply transformative power of the craft. According to some eastern astrologies, this brings us into the year of the black water snake. I sit here now with my wise healing companion and snake friend, Plutoes. She's going for the places that she finds warmth. She's also not afraid of the dark, in fact, it's where she feels safest (a big part of what makes moonlight ritual so potent). She goes for places that are soft and inviting. She knows that when it comes time to shed the outgrown ways of being, it's a time of retreat. Growing too big for your old skin takes effort and shedding that skin takes safety and trust. She only sheds at home (sometimes waiting weeks for my return from the road) and finally just slithering out as soon as we arrive back in our sanctuary. Before we shed, our coloring muddles, but when we shed, we're at our most colorful and sparkle with vibrancy of new, big life. Spending years with a snake has also taught me how good it can feel to sit and do nothing. I often notice her pausing at the spots where I have pain, helping that pain to pass with breath and intention like the healing animal ally she is. Tomorrow, take some time to focus on what you want to slither into over the next year and next 28 days. What feels soft? warm? welcoming? safe? As this mercury retrograde in Pisces approaches (2/23-3/16ish), let yourself carve out some time for respite and retreat, reflection and rendezvous with spirit. Let yourself linger in what you've outgrown if that's what's called for and trust that you'll be letting go at just the right time. Grieve if you need to. The oceanic Pisces unfolding encourages you to ride the waves of feeling, perhaps on the sparkling skin of a recently shed water snake. Happy New Year! So for 2013, I wish you more witching. More opportunities to claim your power, to slough off old skin, to ritualize your life. May your year have you feeling more attuned to the rhythms of nature, more connected to one another, and more plugged into planet and purpose. The apocalypse has happened, my friends, and it’s still happening. Our task at hand is to bring about the end of the old world, but then to create something vital and shining and new. Instead of four horses, we’re riding in on brooms. Another year of the witch link celebrating deep music in a way that sounds like the parade of planets through Pisces: http://www.disinfo.com/2013/01/2013-year-of-the-witch-midday-veil-edition/
Dear Dark New Moon,
If it be your will, please be kind and help me to know that what is is actually good enough. Help be to gently work toward making it better in a way that aligns with the highest good of all. Let me look in the mirror and know that I am doing my best even when all I can muster doesn't feel like much at all. Help me to build structures that will help our communities thrive. Let me be of service to your will. Show me how to have boundaries of love. Remind me that while asking for help is one of the harder things to do, it is always worth it. Help me to be committed to and love peace, calm, discipline and fortitude. Show me the way to deeper peace, compassion and forgiveness so I can stay flexible even as my focus becomes firmer. Keep my vows sacred even as they break anThank you, sweet Capricorn moment for the gift of loving the work and working the love. In cosmic sincerity, this or something better, Stella* First, an autumnal and apt prayer in the form of a poem: When I rise up let me rise up joyful like a bird When I fall let me fall without regret like a leaf. -Wendell Berry This Friday, October 5th the planet of boundaries and blockages that bring maturity moved from harmony prioritizing Libra into deep, shit-stirring Scorpio. On Friday, my favorite bag(gage) was shit on as I cycled to therapy. A few days later, when I got distracted and rushed, inattentive to the ground I was walking on, I stepped in a pile of it. There's something wonderful about seeing clearly that I had everything I needed to deal with the annoyances (thank goodness for wet wipes left over from Burning Man and it was in that very baggage that needed tending). The tools we need to heal are often revealed only in the emotional baggage and wounds we so often seek to avoid. There's something even more wonderful about realizing that the symbolic universe was tying to come thru and remind me that this next Saturn cycle will be about turning the shit of our lives into the compost that will nourish that which we seek to cultivate. What is it that you wish to bring forth over the next couple of years? Spend some time this Samhain (aka Halloween) and new moon solar eclipse in scorpio (11/13) contemplating and creating the magic necessary to make it happen. And when you have to deal with a bunch of shit, ask yourself how you can transform it into something useful. She says it all:
Construction Timber seasons better if it is cut in the fourth quarter of a barren sign. In Cancer the most fertile of skysigns I shall build a house that will stand forever. Audre Lorde 1972 Our Travel, Tech and Communication ally is encouraging us to slow down, retreat and let go. Here are some travel tips for navigating this mercurial moment lasting from mid-July thru early August:
-Focus on finishing up lingering projects rather than starting new ones (unless you've been thinking about 'em for a long time) -Take some time to retreat, reflect, re-create and re-group (words starting with RE are encouraged) -Back up your computer, get gear repaired, if sh*t starts breaking, go for a walk, it might just work when you get back -Understand that misunderstandings aren't personal, seek to slow down and communicate without words -Laugh at the absurdity of it all -Look for the trickster's higher purpose for the mischief (but don't expect to find the answers) How have you made mercury retrograde work for you? |
Never miss a post!Categories
All
|